I sing and play guitar mainly for Slow Moving Pedestrians, and my side project is called My Little Van Gogh. Both projects can be found on Bandcamp, and you can find Slow Moving Pedestrians tunes on Youtube, Spotify, and Apple Music.
The Polaroid Effect (2025)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. Tapwater
- 2. Tylenol
- 3. Dry Ice
- 4. Bagels in Babylon (Fire Escapes)
- 5. How to Approach Women
- 6. No Halo
- 7. I Saw the TV Glow
- 8. Audrey
- 9. Kardashev Type II Civilization
- 10. Compass Feet
- 11. The Starman
The Hanseatic League EP (2024)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. Visby (play)
- 2. Low Saxon (play)
- 3. Rime of the Anxious Mariner (play)
- 4. The Urchin's Ballad (play)
- 5. Quiet, Please (play)
In a three room rented townhouse
I waited the summer out
On the edge of the edge of the world
Where you always hoped your life would turn out
I didn’t speak much of the language
You never taught me more than hello
I didn’t have anything to say to anyone
Five thousand miles from home
I watched the fishing boats sail across the horizon
And nursed the 30 kronur coffee I bought
You would have liked this view I think
But maybe not
Well the further I go, the more that I know
That life is a Mercator projection
When you looked at me I saw love in your eyes but
You were staring at your reflection
Well the further I go, the more that I know
That life is a Mercator projection
When you looked at me I saw love in your eyes but
You were staring at your reflection
In a three room rented townhouse
I waited the summer out
On the edge of the edge of the world
Where you always hoped your life would turn out
I waited the summer out
On the edge of the edge of the world
Where you always hoped your life would turn out
I didn’t speak much of the language
You never taught me more than hello
I didn’t have anything to say to anyone
Five thousand miles from home
I watched the fishing boats sail across the horizon
And nursed the 30 kronur coffee I bought
You would have liked this view I think
But maybe not
Well the further I go, the more that I know
That life is a Mercator projection
When you looked at me I saw love in your eyes but
You were staring at your reflection
Well the further I go, the more that I know
That life is a Mercator projection
When you looked at me I saw love in your eyes but
You were staring at your reflection
In a three room rented townhouse
I waited the summer out
On the edge of the edge of the world
Where you always hoped your life would turn out
Kitty came back today for the first time in a while
She cut Low Saxon through her teeth, I bet you smiled
Tore her arms off, ate the bugs and mowed the lawn
Took off her coat and now she's gone
Left the light on in the attic where she slept
Cockroach boxes full of memories unkept
Drawers of scissors, triggers, prescription bupropion
Fundamental feelings we both disagree on
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesn't have meaning
And everything you said
Has always been daydreaming
Took to port wine on a bench all by myself
Toasted packet loss and our declining health
Ride the brainrot through a new soma vacation
You taught me how to listen for those distant stations
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesnt have meaning
And everything you said
Is what I still hear screaming
I'm all banged up
On a resume bender
Mediocrity
In all of its splendor
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesn't have meaning
And everything you said
Is what I hear screaming
We're all grown up
It's not gonna thrill you
We're all grown up
It's all gonna kill you
Cause if it makes sense
Cause if it makes sense
Cause if it makes sense
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesn't have meaning
And everything you said
Has always been daydreaming
She cut Low Saxon through her teeth, I bet you smiled
Tore her arms off, ate the bugs and mowed the lawn
Took off her coat and now she's gone
Left the light on in the attic where she slept
Cockroach boxes full of memories unkept
Drawers of scissors, triggers, prescription bupropion
Fundamental feelings we both disagree on
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesn't have meaning
And everything you said
Has always been daydreaming
Took to port wine on a bench all by myself
Toasted packet loss and our declining health
Ride the brainrot through a new soma vacation
You taught me how to listen for those distant stations
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesnt have meaning
And everything you said
Is what I still hear screaming
I'm all banged up
On a resume bender
Mediocrity
In all of its splendor
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesn't have meaning
And everything you said
Is what I hear screaming
We're all grown up
It's not gonna thrill you
We're all grown up
It's all gonna kill you
Cause if it makes sense
Cause if it makes sense
Cause if it makes sense
Cause if it makes sense
Then it doesn't have meaning
And everything you said
Has always been daydreaming
When I first see you
Man, what should I say?
Will I wave my hand
Or just nod and say hey?
Are you expecting some kind of clever line
Where I reference the Arctic in your eyes?
When I first see you
Will a hug be too much?
What if I bump you with my hat
Maybe a hug is too much
What if I take off my hat?
No, that would probably just look weird
When I first see you
Will you notice my arms?
How they're bigger right now
Than how they were in the fall
Is that still something that you care about at all?
I hope so
I hope so
When I first see you
Or will you first see me?
Standing alone in a crowd looking listlessly
Between the direction I'm expecting you and my phone
And my phone
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you
I'll be happy to see you
Because seeing you always makes me happy
Man, what should I say?
Will I wave my hand
Or just nod and say hey?
Are you expecting some kind of clever line
Where I reference the Arctic in your eyes?
When I first see you
Will a hug be too much?
What if I bump you with my hat
Maybe a hug is too much
What if I take off my hat?
No, that would probably just look weird
When I first see you
Will you notice my arms?
How they're bigger right now
Than how they were in the fall
Is that still something that you care about at all?
I hope so
I hope so
When I first see you
Or will you first see me?
Standing alone in a crowd looking listlessly
Between the direction I'm expecting you and my phone
And my phone
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you, when I first see you
When I first see you
I'll be happy to see you
Because seeing you always makes me happy
Well your old man went out to sea
There are no fortunes found in just one harbor town
And you took to the streets
And taught yourself to laugh
The disappointment fades with time
But the scars on your arms leave their own tan lines
And to you they're just arms
You forget they're scarred
And every summer you'd climb the Kopu light and nail your eyes to the horizawn
There wasn't a cog on the edge of the night that you didn't train your eyes on
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
And the places that you'd stay
Just renting the room until St John's Day
When you'd seek the flower of the fern
And change your crowd
And the bitter almond scent
That would color your wake, and cause much lament
But the fault, you reason out,
Is in our stars
And every winter you'd find gossamer trailing from your fingers to the ground
And you'd snap each piece so carefully, as to never turn around
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
There are no fortunes found in just one harbor town
And you took to the streets
And taught yourself to laugh
The disappointment fades with time
But the scars on your arms leave their own tan lines
And to you they're just arms
You forget they're scarred
And every summer you'd climb the Kopu light and nail your eyes to the horizawn
There wasn't a cog on the edge of the night that you didn't train your eyes on
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
And the places that you'd stay
Just renting the room until St John's Day
When you'd seek the flower of the fern
And change your crowd
And the bitter almond scent
That would color your wake, and cause much lament
But the fault, you reason out,
Is in our stars
And every winter you'd find gossamer trailing from your fingers to the ground
And you'd snap each piece so carefully, as to never turn around
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
You're an urchin, you're an urchin
O, just, subtle, and mighty opium
For the pangs that will never heal
For just one night, give back the afternoons of youth
Overload my capacity tuh feel
I’m bending all of space and time
The quiet has become sublime
I’m so far from your carnal crime
And I can’t hear you
The ocean has become the sky
The stern, the deck, horizon line
My hands are stained incarnadine
And I can’t hear you
Quiet, please
I think that nothing’s wrong
I think im almost gone
Quiet, please
I think I’ve lived too long
I think I ate too much
For the pangs that will never heal
For just one night, give back the afternoons of youth
Overload my capacity tuh feel
I’m bending all of space and time
The quiet has become sublime
I’m so far from your carnal crime
And I can’t hear you
The ocean has become the sky
The stern, the deck, horizon line
My hands are stained incarnadine
And I can’t hear you
Quiet, please
I think that nothing’s wrong
I think im almost gone
Quiet, please
I think I’ve lived too long
I think I ate too much
The Coffee at the Anchor Hotel (2023)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. The Coffee at the Anchor Hotel
- 2. Sardonyx
- 3. Grace Kelly (White Dress)
- 4. Last Train Home (play)
- 5. Froslass Pokémon Card
- 6. Snoopy and the Red Baron (Pts. 1 & 2)
- 7. Crow
- 8. Memories Of The Future That Never Happened
- 9. And So We Put Goldfish In The Pool
The calendar hung at an unconvincing angle
I thought about it with my thoughts all tangled
And the sharpie cast aside left a date underlined
It was the day that I was coming home to you
Two years and some change disappeared overnight
I thought about it basically the whole flight
But I had an ocean left in my personal reserves
It was weathering my nerves
But the way that you distanced yourself
Was the answer that nothing left was there
But I could clearly see the ghost of myself
With your hands in his hands and his face in your hair
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
There are a million little things I still need you to know
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
I need you more these days than you could know
Last October you said you don't keep up with old friends
I should have known then how all this would end
a vegetarian with a nihilist would be destined for snags
With rose colored glasses, red flags are just flags
But right outside the station gates
You offered me one more moment of prayer
My hands against your shoulder blades
My face pressed between your hood and your hair
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
There are a million little things I still need you to know
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
For now let me keep holding you close
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
There are a million little things I still need you to know
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
For now let me keep holding you close
Is it that my hair is dumb? Cause I can
Tidy it up we can work through that
Is it that I live too far? Cause I can
Move closer, we can work through that
Is it that you met someone else? Cause we can
Still be friends, we can work through that
Is it that I’m just too short? Well I can’t
Do much there but we can work around that
Is it that you’ve just gotten bored? Well I can
Learn some new things we can work through that
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
I’m shaking, I’m scared, so please hold me close
And sure I’ll survive but
I’d rather die
If it means you’re not someone I know
I thought about it with my thoughts all tangled
And the sharpie cast aside left a date underlined
It was the day that I was coming home to you
Two years and some change disappeared overnight
I thought about it basically the whole flight
But I had an ocean left in my personal reserves
It was weathering my nerves
But the way that you distanced yourself
Was the answer that nothing left was there
But I could clearly see the ghost of myself
With your hands in his hands and his face in your hair
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
There are a million little things I still need you to know
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
I need you more these days than you could know
Last October you said you don't keep up with old friends
I should have known then how all this would end
a vegetarian with a nihilist would be destined for snags
With rose colored glasses, red flags are just flags
But right outside the station gates
You offered me one more moment of prayer
My hands against your shoulder blades
My face pressed between your hood and your hair
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
There are a million little things I still need you to know
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
For now let me keep holding you close
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
There are a million little things I still need you to know
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
For now let me keep holding you close
Is it that my hair is dumb? Cause I can
Tidy it up we can work through that
Is it that I live too far? Cause I can
Move closer, we can work through that
Is it that you met someone else? Cause we can
Still be friends, we can work through that
Is it that I’m just too short? Well I can’t
Do much there but we can work around that
Is it that you’ve just gotten bored? Well I can
Learn some new things we can work through that
"I don't wanna let go" "You
have to let go"
I’m shaking, I’m scared, so please hold me close
And sure I’ll survive but
I’d rather die
If it means you’re not someone I know
The Pavement Ends Here (2022)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. Porch Song (play)
- 2. Drip Dry (play)
- 3. Black Dress (play)
- 4. Blueberry Frost (play)
- 5. Drip Dry (demo) (play)
On the porch in the middle of the night
The cicadas all sang and I felt alright
The stars were out and the moon was bright
From my view on the porch in the middle of the night
I saw you standing in a lithium dream
With your hair tied up and your eyes agleam
Your face was wet from the percolator steam
And the Saturday stood exactly as it seemed
And the pavement ends right here but the road goes on ahead
The headlights light the branches up, dirt crunches ‘neath my tread
My arms are loose
The sidewalk recalled all the scorch of the day
While sleeping in the trees were the birds I became
The plug flow reactor driving my veins
Flows a little slower now that the daylight has drained
On the porch in the middle of the night
I heard wind chimes twinkle and I felt alright
The crickets all chirping just a little out of sight
And the air was warm in the middle of the night
The cicadas all sang and I felt alright
The stars were out and the moon was bright
From my view on the porch in the middle of the night
I saw you standing in a lithium dream
With your hair tied up and your eyes agleam
Your face was wet from the percolator steam
And the Saturday stood exactly as it seemed
And the pavement ends right here but the road goes on ahead
The headlights light the branches up, dirt crunches ‘neath my tread
My arms are loose
The sidewalk recalled all the scorch of the day
While sleeping in the trees were the birds I became
The plug flow reactor driving my veins
Flows a little slower now that the daylight has drained
On the porch in the middle of the night
I heard wind chimes twinkle and I felt alright
The crickets all chirping just a little out of sight
And the air was warm in the middle of the night
A mesh sack of crumpled twice worn shirts and an old sony Walkman
Navigate a street of white flowers and well weathered watering cans
A nervous thumb taps prayers of return in a Morse code know one knows
Make for the crosswalk with the blinking man, almost trip on a garden hose
Step inside the Lawson and switch some bills for change
Glance up at the sky as the cashier mentions rain
Release a forced smile and step onto the sidewalk, out of the convenience store
The wind swirls a few discarded leaves and you feel it in your core
Dash across the street as the sprinkles come down while flailing for your hood
Think about the umbrella still packed away and paint your day with shoulds
Step inside the laundromat as thunder shakes the sky
Pack your clothes into a machine, by the driers you drip-dry
Navigate a street of white flowers and well weathered watering cans
A nervous thumb taps prayers of return in a Morse code know one knows
Make for the crosswalk with the blinking man, almost trip on a garden hose
Step inside the Lawson and switch some bills for change
Glance up at the sky as the cashier mentions rain
Release a forced smile and step onto the sidewalk, out of the convenience store
The wind swirls a few discarded leaves and you feel it in your core
Dash across the street as the sprinkles come down while flailing for your hood
Think about the umbrella still packed away and paint your day with shoulds
Step inside the laundromat as thunder shakes the sky
Pack your clothes into a machine, by the driers you drip-dry
In a black dress, season wasn't season enough
Morning FUBAR, afternoon doesn't have to be fucked
Covered in tattoos that only you can see
Anything to make your skin feel clean
In a black dress, black boots, black thigh highs
Doing what you can not to look the lookers in the eye
Angel following you in a hospital gown
Eyes brown
Headed west on the train, there's a lilac sky
Out of spoons and the tunes in your ears feel dry
Maybe things will get better, maybe first they'll get worse
You're a hand in Newton's clockwork universe
When you reach your door, will you linger there
An empty room is a tomb as much as anywhere
The bedroom window reflects a most breathtaking view
Eyes blue
White thy fambles, finally laid to rest on the keys
Kernel given principal component analyses
Now there's nothing to stop the transmission of thoughts
Between the latency and packet loss
There's a gentle click, quite ironically
All the corner cases fading into binary
And it's gonna be fine, yeah it's gonna be fine, yeah it's gonna be fine
Morning FUBAR, afternoon doesn't have to be fucked
Covered in tattoos that only you can see
Anything to make your skin feel clean
In a black dress, black boots, black thigh highs
Doing what you can not to look the lookers in the eye
Angel following you in a hospital gown
Eyes brown
Headed west on the train, there's a lilac sky
Out of spoons and the tunes in your ears feel dry
Maybe things will get better, maybe first they'll get worse
You're a hand in Newton's clockwork universe
When you reach your door, will you linger there
An empty room is a tomb as much as anywhere
The bedroom window reflects a most breathtaking view
Eyes blue
White thy fambles, finally laid to rest on the keys
Kernel given principal component analyses
Now there's nothing to stop the transmission of thoughts
Between the latency and packet loss
There's a gentle click, quite ironically
All the corner cases fading into binary
And it's gonna be fine, yeah it's gonna be fine, yeah it's gonna be fine
Latin part— Catullus 52, here’s a translation
Godlike the man who
sits at her side, who
watches and catches
that laughter
which (softly) tears me
to tatters: nothing is
left of me, each time
I see her,
. . . tongue numbed; arms, legs
melting, on fire; drum
drumming in ears; head-
lights gone black.
—
Soliloquy from Cyrano de Bergerac
She's a danger mortal,
All unsuspicious--full of charms unconscious,
Like a sweet perfumed rose--a snare of nature,
Within whose petals Cupid lurks in ambush!
He who has seen her smile has known perfection,
--Instilling into trifles grace's essence,
Divinity in every careless gesture;
Not Venus' self can mount her conch blown sea-ward,
As she can step into her chaise a porteurs,
Nor Dian fleet across the woods spring-flowered,
Light as my Lady o'er the stones of Paris!
—
Passage from A Girl I Knew by JD Salinger
The apartment below mine had the only balcony of the house. I saw a girl standing on it, completely submerged in the pool of autumn twilight. She wasn’t doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together. The way the profile of her face and body refracted in the soupy twilight made me feel a little drunk. When a few seconds had throbbed by, I said hello to her. She then looked up at me, and though she seemed decorously startled, something told me she wasn’t too surprised that I had heard her doing the Boswell number. This didn’t matter, of course. I asked her, in murderous German, if I might join her on the balcony. The request obviously rattled her. She replied, in English, that she didn’t think her ‘fahzzer’ would like me to come down to see her. At this point, my opinion of girls’ fathers, which had been low for years, struck bottom. But nevertheless I managed a drab little nod of understanding.
—
A random poem I wrote last spring
You are all the forgotten New Years resolutions.
You’re the patches of snow on the ground that will be gone by noon the day after it snows.
You are the feeling of falling asleep on a picnic blanket on a warm day, while someone sits next to you reading.
You are the feeling of wet grass, so wet that it squeaks underfoot.
You are the first warm weekend of the year.
You are a shopping trip exclusively to buy the brightest, reddest strawberries anyone has ever seen.
You are every word for productivity.
You are music made for airports.
You are dozing off in uncommon places, like in front of doors or on staircases or upside down.
You are playing catch in the park until the sun sets at 9pm, and then a bit later even though you can hardly see.
You are knowing the names of several constellations and stars and the pride of teaching them to somebody.
You are the satisfaction of a shower when you can feel the hot dried-sweat salt coating your skin.
You are the second sip of a glass of whisky.
You are putting completed tasks on a todo list just to immediately check them off.
You are the difference between a firefly and a lightning bug.
You are the words ‘sweater weather.’
You are decade old memories of the subtle emotions and internal images from reading a novel.
You are the sea of umbrellas traveling down a sidewalk.
Godlike the man who
sits at her side, who
watches and catches
that laughter
which (softly) tears me
to tatters: nothing is
left of me, each time
I see her,
. . . tongue numbed; arms, legs
melting, on fire; drum
drumming in ears; head-
lights gone black.
—
Soliloquy from Cyrano de Bergerac
She's a danger mortal,
All unsuspicious--full of charms unconscious,
Like a sweet perfumed rose--a snare of nature,
Within whose petals Cupid lurks in ambush!
He who has seen her smile has known perfection,
--Instilling into trifles grace's essence,
Divinity in every careless gesture;
Not Venus' self can mount her conch blown sea-ward,
As she can step into her chaise a porteurs,
Nor Dian fleet across the woods spring-flowered,
Light as my Lady o'er the stones of Paris!
—
Passage from A Girl I Knew by JD Salinger
The apartment below mine had the only balcony of the house. I saw a girl standing on it, completely submerged in the pool of autumn twilight. She wasn’t doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together. The way the profile of her face and body refracted in the soupy twilight made me feel a little drunk. When a few seconds had throbbed by, I said hello to her. She then looked up at me, and though she seemed decorously startled, something told me she wasn’t too surprised that I had heard her doing the Boswell number. This didn’t matter, of course. I asked her, in murderous German, if I might join her on the balcony. The request obviously rattled her. She replied, in English, that she didn’t think her ‘fahzzer’ would like me to come down to see her. At this point, my opinion of girls’ fathers, which had been low for years, struck bottom. But nevertheless I managed a drab little nod of understanding.
—
A random poem I wrote last spring
You are all the forgotten New Years resolutions.
You’re the patches of snow on the ground that will be gone by noon the day after it snows.
You are the feeling of falling asleep on a picnic blanket on a warm day, while someone sits next to you reading.
You are the feeling of wet grass, so wet that it squeaks underfoot.
You are the first warm weekend of the year.
You are a shopping trip exclusively to buy the brightest, reddest strawberries anyone has ever seen.
You are every word for productivity.
You are music made for airports.
You are dozing off in uncommon places, like in front of doors or on staircases or upside down.
You are playing catch in the park until the sun sets at 9pm, and then a bit later even though you can hardly see.
You are knowing the names of several constellations and stars and the pride of teaching them to somebody.
You are the satisfaction of a shower when you can feel the hot dried-sweat salt coating your skin.
You are the second sip of a glass of whisky.
You are putting completed tasks on a todo list just to immediately check them off.
You are the difference between a firefly and a lightning bug.
You are the words ‘sweater weather.’
You are decade old memories of the subtle emotions and internal images from reading a novel.
You are the sea of umbrellas traveling down a sidewalk.
you can't paint the whole world yellow (2021)
by My Little Van Gogh
- 1. pterrys with surya at 630am (play)
- 2. bury me in waggener hall, it's the only place i feel dead (play)
- 3. veigar adc yuumi support (play)
- 4. now tomorrow (play)
- 5. sunday morning, medicine tree (play)
//a song about albert camus
in a pterry's parking lot at 0930 in the morning
i sat chewing on an egg sandwich, it tasted pretty boring
the world felt grey, and quiet, and slow
as the sun climbed up the sky's eastern wall
but it didnt really glow
the rest of the day reverberated silence
if i had energy id have been incredibly violent
i listen to a song about feeling something terrible deep inside
i knew that in the end i'd have to do something about it
but right now id settle for cherry coke
in a pterry's parking lot at 0930 in the morning
i sat chewing on an egg sandwich, it tasted pretty boring
the world felt grey, and quiet, and slow
as the sun climbed up the sky's eastern wall
but it didnt really glow
the rest of the day reverberated silence
if i had energy id have been incredibly violent
i listen to a song about feeling something terrible deep inside
i knew that in the end i'd have to do something about it
but right now id settle for cherry coke
//a song about dazai osamu
2am talking quickly
arms shaking stomach sickly
pour myself some slow down gin
spill on the countertop
take my thoughts to the street
outrunning my own heartbeat
tell myself a stupid joke lol
context switch check the stars
context switch check for cars
one eye on the pavement one glued to the void above
my brain's a bag of broken glass
please don't let this feeling pass
the unbridled terror of a fourth grader in love
i am human
sleep opium and pain
leopardi's cures for the brain
only in my nightmares can i find rest
but now i feel north of great
elated on camusian hate
i need to be the one this broken planet detests
5am language breaking stomach sickly arms shaking
pour myself some speed up coffee
spill on the countertop
take my thoughts up to my room
pray for a reply from you
tell myself a stupid joke gorillaz laughter
2am talking quickly
arms shaking stomach sickly
pour myself some slow down gin
spill on the countertop
take my thoughts to the street
outrunning my own heartbeat
tell myself a stupid joke lol
context switch check the stars
context switch check for cars
one eye on the pavement one glued to the void above
my brain's a bag of broken glass
please don't let this feeling pass
the unbridled terror of a fourth grader in love
i am human
sleep opium and pain
leopardi's cures for the brain
only in my nightmares can i find rest
but now i feel north of great
elated on camusian hate
i need to be the one this broken planet detests
5am language breaking stomach sickly arms shaking
pour myself some speed up coffee
spill on the countertop
take my thoughts up to my room
pray for a reply from you
tell myself a stupid joke gorillaz laughter
//a song about pulling 2 consecutive all-nighters to write a file system
i think I’m having a nervous breakdown
so fucking leave me alone I’m fine
why do I take meds that don’t work I
gave up drinking for this I’m fine
i think I’m gonna spend today on the couch
and try to go back to sleep
let me forget about all the subtext constantly screaming at me
will somebody please notice that
im not addicted to cigarettes
it’s harder than you think to keep the stacks clean
when the whole railyard is a mess
i think I’m gonna go to Surya’s house
and drink a gallon of dried plum tea
im going off the grid but I’ll be home sometime before the end of the week
has anybody noticed that
your mere existence detracts
from the stability of those who know you
you mess up everyone that knows you
please leave me somewhere I can sleep
melatonin dreams are all that I can take
why can’t you go away
i can’t handle this today
if you say one more thing I swear to god my head will break
i think I’m having a nervous breakdown
so fucking leave me alone I’m fine
why do I take meds that don’t work I
gave up drinking for this I’m fine
i think I’m gonna spend today on the couch
and try to go back to sleep
let me forget about all the subtext constantly screaming at me
will somebody please notice that
im not addicted to cigarettes
it’s harder than you think to keep the stacks clean
when the whole railyard is a mess
i think I’m gonna go to Surya’s house
and drink a gallon of dried plum tea
im going off the grid but I’ll be home sometime before the end of the week
has anybody noticed that
your mere existence detracts
from the stability of those who know you
you mess up everyone that knows you
please leave me somewhere I can sleep
melatonin dreams are all that I can take
why can’t you go away
i can’t handle this today
if you say one more thing I swear to god my head will break
//a song about pleasure
im not sure I even woke up today
i don’t remember if I slept but I know I dreamt
i had two cups of coffee and a long shower
both liquids were as heavy as wet cement
down at the creek all the birds were waking up
and getting their songs in before the afternoon heat
they echoed around in my hollow insides
and I waved at the void as it stared into me
every single thought I had
was the feeling of you
i paced the house for a little bit
and found nothing that seemed worthy of my now ample time
i tried to organize the output stream of my brain
i didn’t get anywhere, but I promise I tried
cause every single thought I had
was the feeling of you
im terrified nothing will be enough after you
i know that I should but I’m trying not to move
on cause I know I’ll never feel quite this strongly again
about anything
i ought to change my phone background
i ought to tidy up my room
but i wont cause i dont wanna lose the pain by moving on from you
i ought to call up all my friends
i ought to go outside and move
i dont wanna do any of that
this loss is a feeling i dont wanna lose
im not sure I even woke up today
i don’t remember if I slept but I know I dreamt
i had two cups of coffee and a long shower
both liquids were as heavy as wet cement
down at the creek all the birds were waking up
and getting their songs in before the afternoon heat
they echoed around in my hollow insides
and I waved at the void as it stared into me
every single thought I had
was the feeling of you
i paced the house for a little bit
and found nothing that seemed worthy of my now ample time
i tried to organize the output stream of my brain
i didn’t get anywhere, but I promise I tried
cause every single thought I had
was the feeling of you
im terrified nothing will be enough after you
i know that I should but I’m trying not to move
on cause I know I’ll never feel quite this strongly again
about anything
i ought to change my phone background
i ought to tidy up my room
but i wont cause i dont wanna lose the pain by moving on from you
i ought to call up all my friends
i ought to go outside and move
i dont wanna do any of that
this loss is a feeling i dont wanna lose
Odi et Amo (2019)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. Rain Dance (play)
- 2. The Last Limits of Complete Devotion (play)
- 3. God No Fuck (play)
- 4. Horehound Candy (play)
- 5. A Perfect Day for Bananafish (play)
- 6. Going to Houston III: Houston, We Have a Problem (play)
- 7. Autumn Eyes (play)
- 8. Scorpion Song (play)
- 9. Food Truck Tacos (play)
I’m too sober to feel comfortable about how little I care about anything right now
But I won’t drink more, so I can avoid the store, because I’m comfy in my bedroom right now
Instead I think I’ll
Lie right here with all these empty cans of beer and watch this anime and try to self insert
And when I finish off the season I will jerk off for no reason other than the fact I like to feel like dirt
Oh, uh-oh, oh, uh-oh
Fuck fuck fuck god no fuck
Oh, uh-oh, oh, uh-oh
Fuck fuck fuck god no fuck
Showers are no longer warm
Theyre just uncomfortably wet
I’d take an extra semester
But I’m terrified of debt
Though I’ve gone over the falls
There’s nothing that I regret
But I feel a little guilt for letting everybody down
In my mind
I can see
The disappointed face of ten year old me
I’m just a little more tired than planned
I’m a NyQuil junkie living off of granola bars and iced tea
Terrified of lizards, the government and the economy
Existence preceding essence is something I can believe
But that doesn’t always imply it’s coming soon
But I won’t drink more, so I can avoid the store, because I’m comfy in my bedroom right now
Instead I think I’ll
Lie right here with all these empty cans of beer and watch this anime and try to self insert
And when I finish off the season I will jerk off for no reason other than the fact I like to feel like dirt
Oh, uh-oh, oh, uh-oh
Fuck fuck fuck god no fuck
Oh, uh-oh, oh, uh-oh
Fuck fuck fuck god no fuck
Showers are no longer warm
Theyre just uncomfortably wet
I’d take an extra semester
But I’m terrified of debt
Though I’ve gone over the falls
There’s nothing that I regret
But I feel a little guilt for letting everybody down
In my mind
I can see
The disappointed face of ten year old me
I’m just a little more tired than planned
I’m a NyQuil junkie living off of granola bars and iced tea
Terrified of lizards, the government and the economy
Existence preceding essence is something I can believe
But that doesn’t always imply it’s coming soon
It couldn’t have been warmer than 35
The air was pregnant with darkness and cold
We went to the corner store below Abhinav’s room
And bought some swisher sweets cause he wanted smoke
The parking garage roof on a Saturday night was
Quiet and close to the stars as we could get
The smoke trailed off like a lost thought into the sky
And Jai and I laughed when Andrew began to choke
And suddenly I could see your face again
It was difficult to breathe
I opened up my mouth, smoke fell out
And I guess so did you, cause I felt so clean
I’m wasted on these exhausting Tuesdays
Everything turns silver so quickly
It’s always such a perfect day for bananafish
I see them in the sun tinted puddles on the street
The air was pregnant with darkness and cold
We went to the corner store below Abhinav’s room
And bought some swisher sweets cause he wanted smoke
The parking garage roof on a Saturday night was
Quiet and close to the stars as we could get
The smoke trailed off like a lost thought into the sky
And Jai and I laughed when Andrew began to choke
And suddenly I could see your face again
It was difficult to breathe
I opened up my mouth, smoke fell out
And I guess so did you, cause I felt so clean
I’m wasted on these exhausting Tuesdays
Everything turns silver so quickly
It’s always such a perfect day for bananafish
I see them in the sun tinted puddles on the street
I used to be a regular guy
Doing regular things with my regular friends
I used to stay up late playing games
I never missed a chance to sleep in
But that all came to an end one day
Like Adam and Eve, right before the fall
I'll never see this damned world in quite the same way
After a scorpion stung my balls
I rolled out of bed, one morning in June
It was the first day that week I'd risen before noon
And just like any other day I thought of you
My beautiful sperm-producing balls
I combed my hair, and brushed my teeth
I picked out a cool shirt and socks for my feet
I wondered what delicious breakfast I'd eat
(With good nutrition for my balls)
My pants were on the floor right next to my bed
I quickly picked them up and put them onto my legs
And suddenly I felt something brush against my head
And I felt an excruciatingly painful sensation on my balls
Oh scorpion
Stinging with the strength of forty men
In my pants without rhyme or reason
Why'd he have to get me in that region
Ashley called me and said "what's up"
I said, "not much, a scorpion just stung my nuts
"and it feels like they're on fire, holy fuck
I think I'm gonna lose my balls"
I told the scorpion that he was a bitch
I told the scorpion that his mom was a bitch
And then the scorpion died cause he was a bitch
And then I crushed him and his balls
My life has changed now for good
I can never have kids, or get morning wood
I was thrown prematurely into adulthood
When this scorpion stung my balls
Oh scorpion
Stinging with the strength of forty men
In my pants without rhyme or reason
Why'd he have to get me in that region
Doing regular things with my regular friends
I used to stay up late playing games
I never missed a chance to sleep in
But that all came to an end one day
Like Adam and Eve, right before the fall
I'll never see this damned world in quite the same way
After a scorpion stung my balls
I rolled out of bed, one morning in June
It was the first day that week I'd risen before noon
And just like any other day I thought of you
My beautiful sperm-producing balls
I combed my hair, and brushed my teeth
I picked out a cool shirt and socks for my feet
I wondered what delicious breakfast I'd eat
(With good nutrition for my balls)
My pants were on the floor right next to my bed
I quickly picked them up and put them onto my legs
And suddenly I felt something brush against my head
And I felt an excruciatingly painful sensation on my balls
Oh scorpion
Stinging with the strength of forty men
In my pants without rhyme or reason
Why'd he have to get me in that region
Ashley called me and said "what's up"
I said, "not much, a scorpion just stung my nuts
"and it feels like they're on fire, holy fuck
I think I'm gonna lose my balls"
I told the scorpion that he was a bitch
I told the scorpion that his mom was a bitch
And then the scorpion died cause he was a bitch
And then I crushed him and his balls
My life has changed now for good
I can never have kids, or get morning wood
I was thrown prematurely into adulthood
When this scorpion stung my balls
Oh scorpion
Stinging with the strength of forty men
In my pants without rhyme or reason
Why'd he have to get me in that region
Prelapsarianism (2018)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. Gather Honey From the Weed and Make a Moral of the Devil (play)
- 2. Prelapsarianism (play)
- 3. Topless on a Wednesday (play)
- 4. Tennessee Ditty (play)
- 5. Humphrey Bogart (play)
- 6. Going to Houston II: Attack of the Houstons (play)
I'm leaving all my friends for dead
I stay behind by myself barred inside
Searching for a passage out of my head
But all the keys are locked outside
I'm sleeping less and less each day
I'm searching for some real meaningful porn
My diet's gone the quagga's way
So now I breathe the vernal storms
You don't ask me
What I do with my time
Cause you
Don't care anymore
You're out getting high, looking for new feelings
I introduce the bottoms of bottles, to the ceiling
April showers bring you May flowers
May flowers bring my allergies
Don't you tell me
What you do with your time
Cause I
Don't care I don't care I don't fucking care
I stay behind by myself barred inside
Searching for a passage out of my head
But all the keys are locked outside
I'm sleeping less and less each day
I'm searching for some real meaningful porn
My diet's gone the quagga's way
So now I breathe the vernal storms
You don't ask me
What I do with my time
Cause you
Don't care anymore
You're out getting high, looking for new feelings
I introduce the bottoms of bottles, to the ceiling
April showers bring you May flowers
May flowers bring my allergies
Don't you tell me
What you do with your time
Cause I
Don't care I don't care I don't fucking care
Adam told Eve baby we should never leave
There's nothing better past the garden gate
Well Eve told Adam if you do respect your madam
You'll put more apple pie on your plate
Adam shut his mouth when he saw this heading south
But he opened it again and shot his shot
There's tons of free food and I get to see you nude
Let's just be happy with what we got
Eve said
But I'm bored
There's nothing fun to do here
What if life is so much more
I'm bored of this bliss
Let's go
Take the plunge
Shotgun all the kool-aid
I'm sure that
This place
Won't even be missed
Now Adam pulls a plow as sweat condenses on his brow
And he bends an aging back under the sun
He pleaded with the Lord but couldn't get past flaming swords
Now he recalls when life was easy and fun
Eve pushed out a pair of tiny people with no hair
Abel quickly met the young grim reaper
God didn't see him die and said "shit where is that guy"
But Cain didn't sign up to be his keeper
God said
What the fuck?
That kid was your brother
I swear on myself
You people love sin
All right
That's it
I'm throwing out some curses
Life will only get harder
Than it already is
Every night Adam dreams like Dostoyevsky
A bullet borne paradise of ease
Nephilim and sin send him back to earth again
And he smiles because suffering is free
There's nothing better past the garden gate
Well Eve told Adam if you do respect your madam
You'll put more apple pie on your plate
Adam shut his mouth when he saw this heading south
But he opened it again and shot his shot
There's tons of free food and I get to see you nude
Let's just be happy with what we got
Eve said
But I'm bored
There's nothing fun to do here
What if life is so much more
I'm bored of this bliss
Let's go
Take the plunge
Shotgun all the kool-aid
I'm sure that
This place
Won't even be missed
Now Adam pulls a plow as sweat condenses on his brow
And he bends an aging back under the sun
He pleaded with the Lord but couldn't get past flaming swords
Now he recalls when life was easy and fun
Eve pushed out a pair of tiny people with no hair
Abel quickly met the young grim reaper
God didn't see him die and said "shit where is that guy"
But Cain didn't sign up to be his keeper
God said
What the fuck?
That kid was your brother
I swear on myself
You people love sin
All right
That's it
I'm throwing out some curses
Life will only get harder
Than it already is
Every night Adam dreams like Dostoyevsky
A bullet borne paradise of ease
Nephilim and sin send him back to earth again
And he smiles because suffering is free
Seven PM, tail end of a summer's day
Through dark green leaves the sunlight leaves shapes
on your skin as we drive
The hill country is never not hot
And the invisible rope between us
has never been so taught
It'll go slack soon
Before the new moon
You sang la, ladadada, ladadada (But much prettier)
As we roll downhill, your hair falls prey to the wind
You fire back at the world with your twelve gauge grin
Nothing in the mirror
Nothing ahead
You sang la, ladadada.....
Through dark green leaves the sunlight leaves shapes
on your skin as we drive
The hill country is never not hot
And the invisible rope between us
has never been so taught
It'll go slack soon
Before the new moon
You sang la, ladadada, ladadada (But much prettier)
As we roll downhill, your hair falls prey to the wind
You fire back at the world with your twelve gauge grin
Nothing in the mirror
Nothing ahead
You sang la, ladadada.....
You open the blinds and the spring morning comes rushing into the room
You pull the blankets off of me and you smile certain doom
You know I can't say no this time
By the way the sunlight reflects off of your eyes
And that sundress
The smell of fresh coffee and bacon float in through the door
But I'm no stranger to your Trojan wars
Or that sundress
You pull the blankets off of me and you smile certain doom
You know I can't say no this time
By the way the sunlight reflects off of your eyes
And that sundress
The smell of fresh coffee and bacon float in through the door
But I'm no stranger to your Trojan wars
Or that sundress
I was sipping whiskey with a friend of mine
Watching Casablanca
February nine
The rye kept me warm
And I was getting blind
It was a typical night
Going back in time
I saw myself in Bogart's shoes
Staring at the girl
Like I stare at you
With a look of hatred
And longing too
For Parisian days
That have long been through
Reminiscing for subzero rain
The suffering from yesterday is obscured by to
Day and what of you-ooh remains
Life is your porch swing
Rocking between boredom and pain
I staggered out to the small town street
With the baseball summers
Mixed in the concrete
I didn't feel the warmth
Years beneath my feet
I just watered the winter
With the blood I bleed
I lit the polaroids of us on fire
Smiled faintly as I saw
The black tide climb higher
The glasses go on and the cynic gets tired
The glasses go on and the cynic gets tired
Reminiscing for subzero rain
The suffering from yesterday is obscured by to
Day and what of you-ooh remains
Life is your porch swing
Rocking between boredom and pain
Watching Casablanca
February nine
The rye kept me warm
And I was getting blind
It was a typical night
Going back in time
I saw myself in Bogart's shoes
Staring at the girl
Like I stare at you
With a look of hatred
And longing too
For Parisian days
That have long been through
Reminiscing for subzero rain
The suffering from yesterday is obscured by to
Day and what of you-ooh remains
Life is your porch swing
Rocking between boredom and pain
I staggered out to the small town street
With the baseball summers
Mixed in the concrete
I didn't feel the warmth
Years beneath my feet
I just watered the winter
With the blood I bleed
I lit the polaroids of us on fire
Smiled faintly as I saw
The black tide climb higher
The glasses go on and the cynic gets tired
The glasses go on and the cynic gets tired
Reminiscing for subzero rain
The suffering from yesterday is obscured by to
Day and what of you-ooh remains
Life is your porch swing
Rocking between boredom and pain
Here's the part about bee pollen
Here's the part about happy songs
Here's the part about telling tomiko it's a summer camp
And nothing's wrong
You made your bed in valediction
And emptied drawers into big black bags
A hot august breeze blows through
You float on like an untethered flag
The texas sun
The texas sky
290 East is open wide
Going to Houston
Going to Houston
Here's the part about happy songs
Here's the part about telling tomiko it's a summer camp
And nothing's wrong
You made your bed in valediction
And emptied drawers into big black bags
A hot august breeze blows through
You float on like an untethered flag
The texas sun
The texas sky
290 East is open wide
Going to Houston
Going to Houston
Going to Houston (2017)
by slow moving pedestrians
- 1. Going to Houston (play)
Here's the part about bee pollen
Here's the part about happy songs
Here's the part about telling Tomiko it's a summer camp and nothing's wrong
You made your bed in valediction
And emptied drawers into big black bags
There's a hot August breeze and you're an untethered flag
The Texas sun
The Texas sky
290 East is open wide
Going to Houston
Here's the part about happy songs
Here's the part about telling Tomiko it's a summer camp and nothing's wrong
You made your bed in valediction
And emptied drawers into big black bags
There's a hot August breeze and you're an untethered flag
The Texas sun
The Texas sky
290 East is open wide
Going to Houston